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mookmonsta

Most Dreadful Broke-Ass Hookah Experience

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So I've been down to my last 30 bucks til payday for the last 5 or so days. I've had to break a million hookah "rules" just to be able to soothe my hookah cravings.

I ran out of coco buzz coals like a week ago and had to settle for off brand 3 dollar "natural coals" from the smoke shop. They burn out literally 15 minutes after lighting on the stove and leave piles of ash similar to when Santa comes down the chimney on Christmas. And they taste like crap. So, I have resorted to using 4 month old quick light coals...with tangiers shisha...in a semi-broken glass hookah...it's sad and it's awful. But it's (crazily enough) better than using those horrible generic coals.

I'm curious, what is your most depressing hookah experience due to lack of funds/resources? Or just in general? I KNOW for for fact most of you have one!

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Mine is nor so much about being broke (thankfully never happens) but when I can't get to a smoke Shop or there is no stock of natural coals and I have to resort to quick lights

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Gonna blow yall away, but there is a hookah vendor on Ebay that sells two brand new boxes of Titanium Coals for $20 and free two day shipping on them, that should help the broke ass moments and running out of good nats. 

 

On to my most broke ass moment: My nice workhorse egyptian shattered as I placed it on my KM. The bowl had the last of my 5 Cents a Cup/Frozen Lake mix. I scooped it off everything possible and packed it in my janky Chinese vortex bowl because that was the closest thing I had at the time. Thank god I at least had Titanium coals, if I had to do all that then toss quick lights on it I would have just thrown everything out and not smoked that night.

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Gonna blow yall away, but there is a hookah vendor on Ebay that sells two brand new boxes of Titanium Coals for $20 and free two day shipping on them, that should help the broke ass moments and running out of good nats.

On to my most broke ass moment: My nice workhorse egyptian shattered as I placed it on my KM. The bowl had the last of my 5 Cents a Cup/Frozen Lake mix. I scooped it off everything possible and packed it in my janky Chinese vortex bowl because that was the closest thing I had at the time. Thank god I at least had Titanium coals, if I had to do all that then toss quick lights on it I would have just thrown everything out and not smoked that night.

I HATE when that happens. The stock bowl that came with my old nammor hookah shattered the day I got it. I felt so defeated.

On a happier note, I got paid last night and I've got titaniums and 3 social smoke flavors on the way from H-S! The broke moments never last too long

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Gonna blow yall away, but there is a hookah vendor on Ebay that sells two brand new boxes of Titanium Coals for $20 and free two day shipping on them, that should help the broke ass moments and running out of good nats. 

 

On to my most broke ass moment: My nice workhorse egyptian shattered as I placed it on my KM. The bowl had the last of my 5 Cents a Cup/Frozen Lake mix. I scooped it off everything possible and packed it in my janky Chinese vortex bowl because that was the closest thing I had at the time. Thank god I at least had Titanium coals, if I had to do all that then toss quick lights on it I would have just thrown everything out and not smoked that night.

 

I bet you that's the same fucker that sold me bad titaniums and that's the reason why I hate those coals. LOL  :dancingbanana:

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So I've been down to my last 30 bucks til payday for the last 5 or so days. I've had to break a million hookah "rules" just to be able to soothe my hookah cravings.

I ran out of coco buzz coals like a week ago and had to settle for off brand 3 dollar "natural coals" from the smoke shop. They burn out literally 15 minutes after lighting on the stove and leave piles of ash similar to when Santa comes down the chimney on Christmas. And they taste like crap. So, I have resorted to using 4 month old quick light coals...with tangiers shisha...in a semi-broken glass hookah...it's sad and it's awful. But it's (crazily enough) better than using those horrible generic coals.

I'm curious, what is your most depressing hookah experience due to lack of funds/resources? Or just in general? I KNOW for for fact most of you have one!

 

I think I have the mother of all bad experiences with coals. I actually wrote a blog post about it on here: 

 

 

I have a knack for always wanting to try new coals in order to find the ones I like the best, which I have already found by the way, but even then I still want to try more and more obscure brands. No lie I just ordered a box of some brand called Ecoal naturals before jumping in here to respond to this thread. 

 

Anyway I tried Never Xhale coals and to make a long story short; they were SO BAD that my carbon monoxide detector went off at 2am and my girlfriend and I were standing outside the apartment for 30 minutes with all the windows and doors open until the place aired out. luckily for us the alarm didn't wake up our neighbors. 

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I bet you that's the same fucker that sold me bad titaniums and that's the reason why I hate those coals. LOL  :dancingbanana:

Store name is Signaturehookah on ebay. Just now got through my first box of Titaniums from that order and I don't think any of them were bad. I know HJ was unloading a large amount of ones that were of bad quality, but these seem to work brilliantly. They last about an hour or so and burn evenly with only a small bit of ash. They last far longer than the Coconara's I had. Haze cubes are also really nice coals that just keep going.

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Store name is Signaturehookah on ebay. Just now got through my first box of Titaniums from that order and I don't think any of them were bad. I know HJ was unloading a large amount of ones that were of bad quality, but these seem to work brilliantly. They last about an hour or so and burn evenly with only a small bit of ash. They last far longer than the Coconara's I had. Haze cubes are also really nice coals that just keep going.

 

Oh good, is not the same vendor. Thanks for sharing. I went and followed him so I can place the order later on if he still has them. I just placed an order for two boxes of coals so I'll be good for a little while. 

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I started smoking hookah while I was still underage. I found a dollar store (not a 99cents only most things would cost like 3-10$) and they stocked cigar wraps, cigarette papers, some glass pipes not for tobacco use, hookah-hookah, and the starbuzz quicklights.

 

They would always ask you if you were with the police no matter how many times you'd be in there. Needless to say for two years my friends and I would buy everything hookah related they had. At this time I was smoking black n milds as well just because I could buy them at the same place.

 

To sum it up I had many broke ass sessions with hookah-hookah Jamaican rum, key lime pie, 7 spice, and orange. All with mod bowls, mod pipes, and "mod" quick lights. I learned the basic smoke tricks with quicklights, which is disgusting. We must have smoked around 10 kilos worth of hookah-hookah as we were also drinking a lot at the time and playing black ops zombies every single day after school, what else do you do when you are on a zombie rampage on round 25 and drunk off of captain morgan "creamsicles?" Well you crave smoking of course haha

 

That's my horror story, as soon as I turned 18 I bought my first vortex, 108 piece coconara, washable hose, and never looked back. To this day I will not use quicklights or hookah-hookah.

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Signaturehookah is badass, for the record, and hooked me up with my 2015 KM Dark Prince, and he subbed out the hose for the starbuzz aluminum d hose for only like $6 extra.  This guy has awesome customer service so far, and I will be buying from him again.

 

As far as shitty broke ass sessions go, I sir, am fairly white trash, and have smoked from very crappy hookahs in my day...

 

But to date, nothing is as bad as mod bowls, mod pipes, and bad shisha.  I also hate plastic base hookahs.

 

I was smoking hookah with my room mates once, and I had my python out because he was restless.  He like to slither around the perimeter of the room, then he usually comes over to chill on my lap and suck up all my body heat.  On his way back from his perimeter check this particular time, one of my room mates saw something on the news that pissed him off, so he jumped up, which flung the hookah into the wall and the coals into the hall, and the base shattered and he ripped the hose apart all in this one, deft motion...  My snake did not care for this new turn of events, so he turned to face the now aggressive male, and hissed at him so loud, that both of my room mates turned snow white with fear and apprehension, and slowly crept out of the room.  

 

It was horrible...  and hilarious.  

 

My snake was 10 feet at the time.

 

Moral of the story:  Dont smoke cheap hookahs and cheap charcoals and cheap shisha with snakes in the room that has a bi-polar male in it who is sensitive to news.

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Signaturehookah is badass, for the record, and hooked me up with my 2015 KM Dark Prince, and he subbed out the hose for the starbuzz aluminum d hose for only like $6 extra. This guy has awesome customer service so far, and I will be buying from him again.

As far as shitty broke ass sessions go, I sir, am fairly white trash, and have smoked from very crappy hookahs in my day...

But to date, nothing is as bad as mod bowls, mod pipes, and bad shisha. I also hate plastic base hookahs.

I was smoking hookah with my room mates once, and I had my python out because he was restless. He like to slither around the perimeter of the room, then he usually comes over to chill on my lap and suck up all my body heat. On his way back from his perimeter check this particular time, one of my room mates saw something on the news that pissed him off, so he jumped up, which flung the hookah into the wall and the coals into the hall, and the base shattered and he ripped the hose apart all in this one, deft motion... My snake did not care for this new turn of events, so he turned to face the now aggressive male, and hissed at him so loud, that both of my room mates turned snow white with fear and apprehension, and slowly crept out of the room.

It was horrible... and hilarious.

My snake was 10 feet at the time.

Moral of the story: Dont smoke cheap hookahs and cheap charcoals and cheap shisha with snakes in the room that has a bi-polar male in it who is sensitive to news.

That, my friend, is a fucking classic story. Lmao

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Signaturehookah is badass, for the record, and hooked me up with my 2015 KM Dark Prince, and he subbed out the hose for the starbuzz aluminum d hose for only like $6 extra.  This guy has awesome customer service so far, and I will be buying from him again.

 

As far as shitty broke ass sessions go, I sir, am fairly white trash, and have smoked from very crappy hookahs in my day...

 

But to date, nothing is as bad as mod bowls, mod pipes, and bad shisha.  I also hate plastic base hookahs.

 

I was smoking hookah with my room mates once, and I had my python out because he was restless.  He like to slither around the perimeter of the room, then he usually comes over to chill on my lap and suck up all my body heat.  On his way back from his perimeter check this particular time, one of my room mates saw something on the news that pissed him off, so he jumped up, which flung the hookah into the wall and the coals into the hall, and the base shattered and he ripped the hose apart all in this one, deft motion...  My snake did not care for this new turn of events, so he turned to face the now aggressive male, and hissed at him so loud, that both of my room mates turned snow white with fear and apprehension, and slowly crept out of the room.  

 

It was horrible...  and hilarious.  

 

My snake was 10 feet at the time.

 

Moral of the story:  Dont smoke cheap hookahs and cheap charcoals and cheap shisha with snakes in the room that has a bi-polar male in it who is sensitive to news.

 

ROTFLMAO!!!!! oh man you win hands down. I was literally laughing my ass off when I read this. 

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Wasn't shooting to win a competition, just share one of those stories many people will never experience...  I know I'm the odd duck out because I chose to have pythons instead of children...  But I hate kids, and when I'm mad at my snake I can throw him in a cage and ignore him for a week... I'd be a horrible parent...

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Wasn't shooting to win a competition, just share one of those stories many people will never experience... I know I'm the odd duck out because I chose to have pythons instead of children... But I hate kids, and when I'm mad at my snake I can throw him in a cage and ignore him for a week... I'd be a horrible parent...

I have a bearded dragon for the same reason. Lol they are like low maintenance children. Still higher maintenance than snakes, but pretty low maintenance.

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Wasn't shooting to win a competition, just share one of those stories many people will never experience...  I know I'm the odd duck out because I chose to have pythons instead of children...  But I hate kids, and when I'm mad at my snake I can throw him in a cage and ignore him for a week... I'd be a horrible parent...

 

Oh I know it wasn't a competition, but if it were you would win it. :) 

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I have a bearded dragon for the same reason. Lol they are like low maintenance children. Still higher maintenance than snakes, but pretty low maintenance.

 

Yeah I have 2x Beards.  Tons of personality, it's worth the daily feeding :)  

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